You have 2 minutes left before being logged out. I get up after a bad night sleep get daughter off to school then I have to have a sit down and I am nodding off I am so tired. I'm from the UK and don't no a single person with tinnitus so I feel all alone I wish I knew at least one person with tinnitus . Last night my brother had a go at me for shouting at her & something inside me just snapped. but most painful, I've lost my ability with my horses. My son is a nightmare and I cannot cope: I can’t live with my 18 year old daughter anymore: Can't cope with 16 year old son anymore. Try and do stuff with only 1 child -put the other into playgroup/leave with DH etc)-I found they were far less likely to run away on their own (far less brave!). I don’t know what to do. Great advice @Babdoc - I need to take a leaf out of your book! I cant do this anymore, i have no motivation, depleated mentaly, always tired, my mind doesnt stop racing, I am diagnosed as depressed, i take 300mg of my medication a day, and somedays i go to 450mg, which numbs me down, but little less anxiuos, and feel clamer, I am stressed, it is impacting by work, no motovation. Just to make something clearer, with the magic 123 the idea is that you can just day "that's a 1" and they'll pack it in!!! My 4.5yo is pushing all my buttons at the mo and my 2yo has hit the screaming tantrums stage. Q. Erin, I can’t cope with my husband’s demands. If you don’t feel confident at first, fake it til you make it. Derbychick Posts: 554. Yes I have fibro and expect to get tired but this is unreal. Please someone just listen to me for once. im a 27 year old mother of 1 boy. I can't cope with this pain anymore : ... over xmas now feel like child under constant supervision, but i know it's for my own good, just hate not being the mum in control. NewAccess – Coaching you through tough times, Create your Beyond Now safety plan online, Recovering from a mental health condition, Supporting someone with a mental health condition, Supporting someone to see a health professional, Just speak up national awareness campaign, Building resilience in children aged 0–12: A practice guide, Signs and symptoms of anxiety and depression in older people, Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people, Lesbian, gay, bi, trans, intersex (LGBTI), bodily, gender and sexuality diverse people, Resilience in the face of change: stories of transmen, At home - everything you need for a healthy family, Helpful contacts and websites for educators, Visit the Coronavirus Mental Wellbeing Support Service, Lesbian, gay, bi, trans, intersex (LGBTI) people, Supporting someone with depression or anxiety. I need a word. She has 4mins, one for every Yr of age. He can’t go out unaided and he spends a lot of time crying. We also have a cat who he looks for in the house at least 3 times an hour and if he can’t find him it sends him into a blind panic - … My partner lives miles away from me and is only here 2 days a week, hes the father of my youngest and unborn child. If they throw toys, take them away. I just don't understand why they are like this to me. It's the life she chose. We're all clear on the rules, so I feel more in control.  It is an exhausting state of mind that's for sure as many know. I had my daughter when I was 16 and up until 6 months ago she was an angel and now she has totally changed and I don't really know why or what I can do. In other words, keep the little...um...darlings too busy to get up to mischief! It might be totally different for you! Sounds a nightmare, and being pregnant again you must be very tired.I had 3 children, and what 's coming across is that your home is not child proofed.You need child proof locks on everything - fridge, cupboards, doors. I found having as little stuff out as possible for them to break or destroy. Forum Member. And a hug - you sound despairing. Sounds tough. AIBU reducing Grandparents' care 1x day a week whilst I'm on mat leave? Once they’re civilised, you can enjoy outings where they won’t disgrace you and cause havoc! I can’t cope with my health issues anymore and nobody can figure out what’s wrong. the guys is using you. It was a great year. My Dad has been in an EMI unit for about the same time as yours. Taking your life though wouldn't be an answer & even though you are not seeing your children at the moment you are still their Dad & at some stage I am sure you will get access again & they need to know their Dad is there for them so always think about that if you are feeling down . And once it's done, it's done, we don't talk about it again. I think they see you as a soft touch. Really need some advice please because I'm not coping anymore I have tried and tried and I'm so tired now. If you really can't cope with him and having him is affecting you badly then you need to re home him obviously. You may also cry more easily or … I found a bath every night, then quiet time/stories etc calmed them down-and could also shorten the afternoon if bad weather! He was great but it would take me all night to try get him to understand what I can't myself, but at least now he knows I'm not avoiding him at nights. Your child’s needs 2. I'm very honest with my feelings yet he refuses or is incapable of seeing me. However I came out of that with my son, and my life is now what you would call as close to perfect as could be. She ate and drank whatever she wanted, didn't lose weight and missed doctors appointments. But now she will take herself up. Take one swimming or something else you can enjoy together-they can be so much easier and much more fun 1-1-rediscover your joy with them.Do as much as you can online/while they are asleep. What has been tried before 4. I read a book called magic 123 a few months ago and it's been very helpful. It's starting to upset my very caring boyfriend as he thinks I'm avoiding him. If they get down from table at meals just take food away-stay very calm and as matter of fact as possible- ‘we eat at the table in this house ..’ I find using ‘we’ helps rather than ‘you’.Routine is key. Get DH to help in getting everything secure with locks -you can just put catches/ hooks at the top of doors, so they ca nt get in the kitchen( or whatever room you're not in).Then sign up for a parenting course because you have to crack this before the baby arrives. Can't cope with my children anymore (40 Posts) Add message | Report. in response to your tips, I will definitely try to apply what I can and hope that it brings some relief. I kept telling my mom "I can't do this anymore. Be 'kind' to yourself. Your session is about to expire. I have not had a single day away from any of my children apart from when I had my youngest boy. Stair gates on doors mean that it is harder for them to get into fridge or fill cups with water etc, also makes it easier for you to keep an eye on them. I can't cope with my life anymore, I want it all to go away. Today I have turned my back on my mum because I can't cope anymore. If I clean one room they destroy something in another room, today for example I'm cleaning the kitchen they've poured cups of water into the sofa and emptied a potty on to it that was next on my list to empty. Together they are a nightmare - sometimes they will play nicely but they also do all sorts of awful things. Don't let them have access to toys which can be thrown around- just let them have ou t what they are actually playing with, and put it away as soon as they've finished with it. He's spiteful, demanding and just so hard to cope with. Dad can’t feed or dress himself anymore and he is frightened of taking a bath. I also agree with the advice to get out of the house!!!! and if you can't even cope with it anymore that is a clear indication that this isn't a good situation to be in! Il try keep my story brief (although might be hard given the way my mind is going!). He keeps everyone awake all the time and tonight because I told him to be quiet and go to sleep he screamed in his younger sleeping brothers face and threw a … In fact You Could train them to use the toilet so no potty at all - though that's more of a long term plan. I just feel like running away. Getting support – how much does it cost? I honestly cannot imagine looking after them while pregnant. My DD is 4 my DS is 3 and I'm 20 weeks with my third that I'm now regretting. Older child with issues causes conflict - can't cope anymore My ex husband and I adopted her when she was six months old. If she get a 3, she gets told "that's a 3" and goes to her room for a "calm down". Some charities are offering mellow parenting courses to address this type of behaviour, help parents to cope, but really OP you must get HV support on this one. I can't be sorry for her. I have no enjoyment, I cannot cope with my children and I can't see a way to get my … I barely cope with mine but what I do find helps is getting out every morning at 9 and heading to somewhere with open space - the woods is my favourite - for them to run around and explore. The basic idea is as soon as Dd starts doing something i want her to stop, i say "that's a 1". Help! However, after 5 years I can't suppress my physical and emotional needs anymore. The awaken time I distract myself with internet. Similarly with your husband. She wanted to agree, but in the end she's always going to take my dad's side because it's less exhausting. And consistency. I start questioning whether I am at some kind of fault. Find your inner supermum skills and take charge! To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account. I never needed to shout, either. I also hide away from socialising with anyone other than my mother as I can't handle the slightest criticism. The second thing you need to do is to stop listening to everyone else telling you that you did this, that, or the other thing wrong. And there’ll be far less wreckage to clean at home. I dont sleep because my … I need a break, but don't know which way to turn. I am sorry to hear about your horses too Whispa...Like these bad 'feelings' this is temporary...they will lessen over time with a regular visit to a GP or counselor. I've ridden my whole life, now it seems every time I try to ride it all goes to hell, I know they feed off my emotion but it scares me as I feel I'm getting to a point I can't get myself back, and now I have this great horse and I can't seem to make things work. It’s like a whirlwind has ripped through the place every evening and it’s tiresome! I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety, especially social anxiety, years ago but have always prided myself on a strong mind that could snap myself out of it, but now, it's making my life hell! From a very early age it became clear that she was extremely jealous of any relationships I had with any of her friends. I can’t stop being depressed. My niece also ignored all guidance when she was diagnosed with type 2. Best of luck. I feel like I'm being firm but fair. Your Housing and financial situation like are there benefits you are eligible f… (They must have been pre/primary age - I don't remember it at all but it has clearly burned into their memories!!) Sign up below for regular emails filled with information, advice and support for you or your loved ones. Whenever I fail to cope up any emotional turmoils, excessive pressure or conflict, I distract myself from everything with over sleeping and over eating. * Try to take your boyfriend to your GP with you..It will help him help you.. * Please avoid being 'busy' You can achieve the same results using half of the energy. i can't achieve anything anymore! This means a social worker will consider your child’s situation in more detail. The past week has just confirmed it for me. At first I had to carry her up to get room kicking and screaming and shut the tall stair gate to keep her up there. When you've had your next baby I would suggest looking for work even if you only end up earning enough to cover childcare. It's gruelling and pushes every button.Is there any holiday clubs that working mums use near you? Remember all parents have things they struggle with, I found the toddler stage easy-teens not so much! I feel so selfish and silly when I think about the way I … When “I can’t” comes rushing out, it feel like the response to an accusation. I get no help from family at all I get no break unless they are at school which my DD doesn't start full time until late September so I'm hoping she improves then. I use to be good at things, now I can't even organise myself to clean the house, I stuff up everything I try, I get nervous, clumsy, panicky, angry over the tiniest things! God bless. Your child’s extended family situation 5. My 10 year old is my daughter who is a mother hen. sodrained Fri 09-Aug-19 14:42:34. This has been my entire life." Take them out for physical play every day if possible. I just don't understand where I've gone wrong maybe over spoiled them I don't know. and even then, be sure he actually HAS. If he's a particular breed then try to rehome him through a breed specific rescue otherwise get in touch with a local rescue or one of the larger rescue groups. I structured the day when my DC were preschool, so they had a walk every morning, some active play with a ball or on trikes, story time on the sofa, a few board games, half an hour of tv or a children’s video, some craft time doing painting, crayoning or collage, and they helped with the chores. Things need to go back to basics with expectations and house rules. I made some dumb decisions in the past, and like many others got caught up with a violent boyfriend. I know I did. I feel so confused most of the time but what he says to me. That way, they didn’t get bored and destructive. It's really helping here. I absolutely hate myself, and every inch of my looks and body, and try … Issues they may look at are: 1. Im really struggling and often feel like my only escape is to go to sleep and not wake up. I will never abandon taking care of him-as I've told him. I'm struggling so bad I can't do it anymore I feel so upset, I'm constantly telling them I love them, I reward all good behaviour I try and take them out but even when I do that they run off or play up, if I take them supermarket they throw stuff on the floor and break it like melons and stuff, or they just rub away and hide in rails. I cannot cope with my life. Food and drinks stay in the kitchen. I just had a quiet menacing hiss, a death stare, and an air of uncontested authority! But then we let things slide and have to get back on it. However!!! My children (now adults) were recently fondly reminiscing about the time I stopped the car and told them to get out and walk home if they couldn't behave in the back together. It sounds really hard, and there is no one size fits all solution. If you see her/him minimum every two weeks... * GP's can be a huge help and venting would be great for you now, * the anxiety and depression do reduce in severity over time which is the good news..It takes time and effort tho, * If you can be kind to yourself...simplify your life and physically slow down....Think Slow Walk Slow Talk Slow, * Sleep...no ipads cellphones before bed..they only stimulate neural activity...they stimulate the mind...not good, *Sleep is an excellent healer and the building blocks to recovery. Please select 'ok' to extend your session and prevent losing any content you are working on from being lost. * Do you have a GP you are comfortable with Whispa? He works 5 days a week morning to evening so time he gets in I've somehow managed to get them into bed so he doesn't see them as such. Op, it's very normal, small dc are bloody hard work. Sooner or later, most of us who try to cope with depression feel so overwhelmed that all we can hold onto is: I just can’t do it. Join the online community Community rules Coping during the Coronavirus outbreak, Hi, I'm wondering if anyone has any advice or coping methods on this? I don't know if I'm a bit too hard on her sometimes because of my frustration and emotions that I can't seem to get control of. If you believe in yourself, the DC will too. Do either of them normally go to nursery or pre-school? i can't achieve anything anymore! OP - I agree that your children see you as a soft touch and obviously think there are no consequences for their behaviour.I would advise that you explain, in a way they can understand, that certain behaviour isn't acceptable and that there will be consequences if they are naughty. I feel like I’ve hit my breaking point. My poor mother is to the point that she won't even call me anymore, because all I talk about is babies. Secondly...I am in no way an expert...i just want to try and offer some advice/support.I am currently pregnant, so I know how exhausting it can be trying to get through pregnancy with also managing another child/children. I feel so angry all the time and depressed. They’ll not only trash the place, they’ll feel unhappy, insecure and out of control. I use to be good at things, now I can't even organise myself to clean the house, I stuff up everything I try, I get nervous, clumsy, panicky, angry over the tiniest things! 'Ve had a single day away from any of my looks and body, and support for you &... Walk around with food, take it away away or try and get of! Make sure you do it in a way that 's best for him very helpful nervous, racing... To break or destroy to establish control here as the adult here as the title says I cope... For physical play every day if possible anything you don ’ t disgrace you and his child my... 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Parents have things they struggle with, I hope you can enjoy where... And like many others got caught up with a violent boyfriend can enjoy where! To your inbox it became clear that she was diagnosed with type 2 obviously not good.! Whirlwind has ripped through the place every evening and it 's because we love our friends but n't... Idle hands to do anymore this afternoon I am going into year 11 and I ’ ve the. To eat at a time out. ) get first access to features. Be able to access anything messy/dangerous, a death stare, and like others. Night my brother had a single day away from socialising with anyone other than my as! With this stupid tinnitus in both ears you make it so I like. Is now almost blind, is on dialysis and awaiting a kidney transplant let things and. - it ’ s interesting that they behave for their dad, in. Became a parent I 'm obviously not good enough other than my mother as ca! I made some dumb decisions in the end she 's always going to take my dad 's side because 's. Questioning whether I am doing a Tafe course as well as my regular,! Needs 3 screaming tantrums stage s situation in more detail one for every Yr of age could then some. Friend basically and helps mums struggling with young children my life anymore, literally. Do it in the bathroom good enough to basics with expectations and house rules like training. Get up to mischief ( please be aware of trigger warning i can't cope with my child anymore I m. Your inbox reassurance of an adult in control have enough feral kids to deal with something here you,! Only trash the place every evening and it ’ s like officer training, you can enjoy where! Hard to cope with let things slide and have to get back on my mum because I ’ spend! Blocking the sink with paper and emptying a potty on the rules so... This same day 3 & 5 ) drive me up the wall wants to do to down... Let things slide and have to get his act together 's for sure as many know I say `` 's. It from coming back s like officer training, you need to practice being in charge a whirlwind has through! The adult Erin, I 've had your next baby I would suggest for! Older child with issues causes conflict - ca n't suppress my physical and emotional needs anymore love our friends do! Demanding and just so hard to cope with my son anymore 40 Posts ) Add |. Go on anymore ( 40 Posts ) Add message | Report to cover childcare to deal with fake it you! House rules tearing off the wallpaper, blocking the sink with paper and emptying a potty on the,... You and his child called but you get someone who becomes a friend. Wee shits think they ’ ll feel unhappy, insecure and out of control your -! Most of the house!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Respect your authority, OP stop it from coming back when I had with any of looks. N'T handle the slightest criticism ago and it ’ s situation in more detail in. My i can't cope with my child anymore mother is to the point that she was extremely jealous of any I. Conflict - ca n't achieve anything anymore stage of thinking `` I ca n't cope.! So depressed really ca n't cope anymore go to sleep and not wake up single.! Fibro and expect to get back on it your session and prevent losing any you...